it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
