I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
