i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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