At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
So your contact has been changed to "jizz weave" in my phone. Now, as strange and random as that may be, I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have more than one contact that fits that description so please identify yourself.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
Randomize
