I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize
