I take back everything I said about communal showers
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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