i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Randomize