to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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