I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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