All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
