i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
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