what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Randomize
