They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
