How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Randomize
