did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
