that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Text me some of your sweat
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize