How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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