I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
