He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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