i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
