Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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