so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
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