super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
Randomize
