we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
