omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
