i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
