Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
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