I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
Randomize
