JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
