Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize
