You can't motorboat a personality
It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
FUCK WHALES
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
