It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Randomize
