It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
and you fell through a lawn chair
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
