she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Randomize
