In the future we'll all be gay
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
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