Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
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