hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
It's my birthday weekend! I'm getting a Brazilian and he's going to fucking Arkansas. Where the fuck are his priorities?
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
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