Kiss
Puke
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
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