): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
my mom tried to talk to me about my drinking, i somehow turned it around on her, now shes going to AA and I'm going to the bar.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
