would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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