He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
