Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
