Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
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