You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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