You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
