Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
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