I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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