Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize
