What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
this is an emotional support booty call
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
