he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
